求修改英文film report,超急!!!
聽日要用黎做oral,只需睇有無 文法錯/用錯字/串錯字,
內容盡量唔好改,仲有如果自問英文能力唔係咁好,都唔好改,thx ^ ^

文章:
  Good afternoon everyone. Today, I would like to share with you about my feeling of the film 'L change the would'. This is a film that I have watched at last week.

  'L change the world' is the film which talk about a ganius detective, L, and what he did in his last 23 days. This was a virus crisis at that time. The name of the virus called "Death" and it made by K, another genius.

  At the end of the film, L was dead, but he saved and changed the world. He said that only one couldn't change the world. This ending is quite touching for me.

  If I were the director and I have a chance to change the ending of the film, I would not let L dead. It is because L is a good person, and I will not let a good person dead, so I choose to change his world. also, if L had not died, I could watch more story about him.

  Finally, I hope you feel more interested about this film and I would like to say with you 'Only one can't change the world.'
  This is the end of my share,thank you for your attention.




大概想說(中文):
    大家好。今天, 我希望與您分享關於我的電影 'L change the would', 在上星期我觀看了。

     'L change the would' 是談論天才探員, L 的影片, 並且什麼他做了在他的最後23 天。這次的敵人是病毒危機。病毒的名字叫"Death" 並且它由K, 另一個天才製造。

    在最後, L 是死了, 但他拯救了和改造了世界, 並且他說「only one can't change the world.」。這個結尾對我來說是相當感人的。

     如果我是編輯並且我有一次機會改變影片的結尾, 我不會讓L 死。它是因為L 是一個好人, 並且我不會讓一個好人死去, 因此我選擇並且改造他的世界.而且, 如果L 未死, 我就能夠觀看更多關於他的故事。

     最後, 我希望您會對這影片更感興趣和 我希望與您only one can't change the world'

    這是我的分享的結尾, 謝謝您的注意。

[ 本帖最後由 o口o” 於 2008-2-19 00:08 編輯 ]

'L change the would orz

I would like to share with you about my feeling of the film 'L change the would'

i  would like to share the film "L change the would"         

咁就可以了

我寫珍珠港...

急就咪鬼十一點半先擺出黎

今日你Ｐｒｅｓｅｎｔ果時Ｌ　ｃｈａｎｇｅ　ｔｈｅ　ｗｏｒｌｄ　聽到嫌－　－

present首先要有個hook去吸引聽眾注意

講咁多都晒氣= =
樓主今日已經考完=w=

知唔知咩叫聽到嫌!?

以上

唔知

不過廢話又真係聽到厭

唔知仲可以咁多野講

話說L在這場中
没有死去的說
1 day leave

[ 本帖最後由 星馬 於 2008-2-19 19:28 編輯 ]

I believed that when you read this reply, you have already finished your presentation.
However, I hope my suggestion can help your next presentation.
Basically, in your speech you need to hook your audience.
You can tell a short story or your experience about the topic of your present
Also you can ask a question, your audience may not answer you, it’s only a part of your opening remarks.
  Good afternoon everyone. Today, I would like to share with you about my feeling of the film 'L change the world’ that I have seen last week.
Anyone had ever seen this film?
It is about a genius detective, L, and what he did in his last 23 days in his life. In the story, he was facing a fatal virus called "Death" created by another genius, K.

  At the end of the film, L was dead, but he saved and changed the world. He said that only one couldn't change the world(?). This ending is quite touching for me.

  If I had a chance to change the ending of the film, I would have let L to survive. It is because L is a good person, and I will not let a good man to die, so I want to change his world. Also, if L was alive, I can learn more stories about him.

  Finally, I hope this film will interest you and I would like to say with you 'Only one can't change the world.'(?)
  This is the end of my share, thank you for your attention. Hope you like it.

最衰就係知佢要做oral 諗住幫佢搞到會順口d
點知俾人紅字提醒唔好改佢d野 想點??

用自己常用的說法會比較好=~=.
十一點半抱佛腳就算啦-~-."

琴晚都抱住幫到就幫既心態....
亦都見佢係小軒既同學我先幫佢一下

點知...再睇多次個post 當堂火都黎埋

一句算啦(摸頭)

所以...我以後都唔幫人呀 (淚奔)